Positively Mad! *Teaser*

    The old man was crazy. It didn't take a genius to find that out. He wore a golden crown upside-down upon his wrinkled forehead. The mark of a pharaoh. (A god-damn loopy one at that!)  His ruby-red robes hung loosely around his spindly frame. 

    He was positively mad. I watched as he cackled, drool hanging from his gums. 

    I couldn't help thinking that he looked a lot like the camel he was struggling to get off of.

    Amun-Re was his name, most people just called him Ra. This single-syllable named person was the source of everything on Egypt! It was supposed to be a rare privilege to be training with him!

    Why didn't it feel like it then?

    Well, firstly…..he's old. I was willing to bet that he couldn't even lift up a grain of sand! And lastly…..he was crazy! Senile even!

    This morning, my mother had told me over a cup of sahlab that I was training with him today. 

    Horus' face was priceless!  

    But I doubt it would remain priceless if he saw me now.

    "Help me down child!” the old man rasped. I held my breath and gave him a hand. 

   And boy did he smell! 

    Ra gave me a wink before he pressed his golden cane into the soft earth. Where were we? 

    "We are on the banks of the river Nile!” he smiled. He looked like a turtle.

    "What!” I hissed, "Have you gone mad you crazy old turd!” 

    He gave me a twisted smile, "No child…every god must start their path at the beginning of life. Water.” 

    I sighed, "But Lord Ra! I am the god of chaos! Fire!” Ra shook a bony finger in my face,

    "You are also the god of storms, Seth.” he said crookedly, "There can be no storm without water.”  I rolled my eyes. Ra poked my leg with his cane. "Look Seth. See the water, if you try to push it away from the sand, the water comes again to fill the bond.” he gazed at me, "What can we learn from this Seth?” 

    I glared at the old man, "Set.” I said harshly, "My name is Set. Not Seth.” I dug my toe into the wet sand by the banks of the river, 

    Ra smiled, "I was just like you Seth….er, Set.” 

    I shuddered. 

    "I always used to insist that people called me Ra.” he twisted his cane in his hands, "You might be wondering what sort of training you'll get today, it's going to be spiritual training first. To clear your mind.”  I gaped at the old man. If Horus saw me now…… "First up.” Ra croaked, "Be social.” 

    I withered, "Ra! This is training! Not a course on personality enhancement!” Ra cackled,

    "You think of it that way…but if you are in war, you need allies right? Go. Socialize.” 

    I rolled my eyes, "Who do I socialize with then? Hm? A mortal? A magician? Who else is on the list of people that hunt for my skin?"

    Ra pursed his lips, "What about those boys over there? They seem nice.” I sighed, this old man dragged me half-way through Egypt across the banks of the Nile to socialize with boys.

    I slunk over to the boys, both were chatting away. There was a girl kneeling at their feet, playing with……dolls?

    "Horus?” I said,  "Is that you?” Horus face palmed and gave the other, green-faced guy a look that dripped with oh-yeah-this-guy-is-my-less-cooler-brother-I-forgot-to-mention! 

    "Set?”  He whispered, "What are you doing? I thought you were training with Ra!” I sighed,

    "This is training.” I hissed, "Socialization.” 

    Horus snorted, "Finally.”  I snarled at him.

    "So….Horus.” the green-faced guy said, "Who…"

    "My brother, Set."

    "Oh, you wanna go train now then?"

     "Sure let's go."

    "Oh..my sister. Set, could you play with her while we're gone?” I narrowed my eyes,

    "I don't play with girls.”  I said, out of the corner of my eyes I saw Horus trying not to laugh. 

     "Please? She's little…she won't do no harm!” I sighed

    "Might as well….” I said to him, defeated. The guy smiled,

    "Thanks!” he beamed. He and Horus went running at top speed. I suspected that they might have wanted to ditch the girl and run off somewhere. I looked around for Ra. I saw him sitting at the banks of the Nile. The girl can play with herself. I thought, I walked towards Ra.

    "Hello? Sir? Are you leaving?” I heard someone chirp behind me. I turned to face the girl. "Is that your father?” she asked.

    "No.” I replied, "He's my guardian.” 

    "Can you play tea-party with me?” she beckoned. "I forgot to bring dolls.” I could imagine Horus' cackling if I ever told him…or if he saw me.

    "Sorry kid.” I said, "I-"

    "It's okay.” she replied, ”No one wants to play with me. I'm weird.”

    My heart sunk, "Fine.” I said, "I'll play."